Today is Day 6.
If I could go back in time and love all the parts of me, I would kiss my cheeks and my nose and my chin. I would stroke my hair and brush it gently, taking the time to feel how soft and satiny it feels. I would kiss all of my cuts and bruises and even my scars simply because they are also a part of me. I would hold my hand and pull myself into my lap and wrap my loving arms so tightly around myself that I would have no other way to feel except loved. I would rock myself back and forth and whisper "I love you" into my ear and hold myself close until I fell fast asleep. I would play in the fields and meadows and flowers and run with the sun glistening in my hair as I held hands with my younger self. I would take time to listen and love and dance and sing and acknowledge and love. I would make sure that every part of me felt safe, loved, worthy, and alive. I would see and experience myself as the beautiful soul that I am.
And since I am no longer 2 years old or 8 or 11 or 16 or 19 or 21 or 23 or 25 or 27 or 28, the part of myself that I can focus on loving is the part of me that is right here, right now. The 29-year-old me who wants and needs love and affection and support and acknowledgement just as much as the smaller parts of me. I can't go back in time and do all of those things over, but surely I can send love and light back to myself at various ages and then set an intention to make a different choice in how I relate to myself in moving forward. I can slow down a little more each day to really SEE myself as I grow and learn and navigate through this life as a soul who is lovingly determined to love myself, inside and out, upside and down. Maybe it'll be a miracle when I can look back on this - or maybe it's just a miracle that I am awakening to this now instead of in 40 years because now I have that much more time to love myself.
Today was a fascinating day of elation, awareness, anger, disappointment, courage, fear, love, devotion, opening, expanding, letting go, releasing, vulnerability, and the ever-present reminder to BE PRESENT. Today something shifted. Tomorrow it might shift back or forward or to the left or the right. But that won't take away the fact that today it shifted just enough for me to see the faint hint of light underneath it that reminded me I am moving in the aligned direction of the path that is unfolding as my journey.
Tonight, I am happy and confident to say that I am lucky enough to fall asleep in my own arms. My own loving, gentle, sweet, caring arms.
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