5 Things That Can and Will Happen

Being a nanny is a always a challenge and definitely keeps me on my toes. Based on last week's events, I can prove that there truly never is a dull moment. So, in no particular order, I present 5 Things That Can and Will Happen.

1. The entire container of tiny fish food pellets can and will fall out of the hands of a 4-year-old onto the floor, under the fridge, across the room and under the table. The smell will be horrible and the clean up even worse. Then the kids will want to help clean up which leads to an even bigger mess.

2. In the middle of cleaning up said mess, the vacuum can and will break, thus leaving no other option except the broom and dustpan. The tiny fish food pellets, of course, are too small to clean up with said cleaning instrument, and thus are still sitting on the floor in the kitchen.

3. The 5 and 3/4 year old can and will complain of a tummy ache just as we are arriving to gymnastics class. The nanny can and will ignore the complaints of said tummy ache and thus encourage child to "stop complaining because we came all this way and if you sit out your sister is going to want to sit out as well and we aren't going to pay and come here just to sit and watch" and join the class anyway. The child then can and will proceed to projectile vomit all over the carpet in gymnastics class during jumping jacks. The nanny then can and will feel like an insensitive idiot for not listening to child in the first place, even though child complains of said tummy ache all the time and does not vomit. The gymnastics teacher then can and will shoot nanny a dirty look as nanny gathers both kids and leaves, not even asking for permission for a make-up class.

4. The $11 Amy's Organic frozen pizza can and will burn in the same amount of time that it takes the nanny to walk upstairs to grab dirty laundry and back downstairs again. The children then can and will throw a fit that their pizza is black and tastes yucky. The burned pizza then can and will be the last one when the nanny goes to garage freezer to look for a backup. The kids then can and will eat pancakes for dinner instead.

5. The security alarm can and will randomly go off at 3am, thus scaring the crap out of the nanny and waking the kids. The kids then can and will interpret 3am as 6am and refuse to go back to sleep. The day then can and will start at 3am, leaving everyone exhausted by camp drop-off time. The kids then can and will only go to camp for a half day because they are too tired to stay the full day.

Let's hope for a different set of circumstances for next week. Perhaps a week without burned, over-priced pizza, faulty security alarms, broken vacuums, fish food spills, and puke incidents. One can hope and dream anyway!